Musings, opinions, observations, questions, and random thoughts on island life, Fernandina Beach and more

Musings, opinions, observations, questions, and random thoughts on island life, Fernandina Beach and more

Could Tucker Carlson Revive The Flatlining Bud Light Brand?

Attention Anheuser-Busch!

Here’s a proposal that could take your terminal Bud Light brand off life support and miraculously breathe new life into that flatlining brewski.

In every bar I’ve been to the past few weeks I hear morbid jokes about the dying brand. Nobody wants it. Even people who traditionally quaff and really liked the stuff don’t want anything to do with it any more. I’ve watched people who have been offered free Bud Lights turn them down.

The LGBTQ+ crowd doesn’t want it either. It’s been reported that gay bars in Chicago are boycotting Bud Light because they say it hasn’t fully supported Dylan Mulvaney, the guy giggler in a tub portrayed holding a Bud Light, who says he’s a gal and is a key player in this marketing mess.

The right’s mad, the left’s mad and Bud’s numbers are bad. And they’re getting worse reports Beer Business Daily.

The Bud Light marketing organization’s incomprehensible decision to align their beer with a transvestite has alienated 99.99 percent of beer-swilling Americans including the brewery’s entire contingent of Bud Light guzzling men. Beer drinking guys don’t want to be associated with a giggling bubble bath-bathing, bra-wearing buffoon boosting a Bud. They say being seen buying or drinking a Bud Light labels them part of that bizarre lifestyle.

While the company’s two marketing geniuses have been exiled to the pit of misery and are shoo ins for the Marketing Hall of Shame, Anheuser-Busch has also reportedly blamed and fired a “third-party ad agency” for the brand’s demise. The promotional fiasco has so far prompted a nationwide sales plunge of almost 25 percent for Bud Light and cost the company about $5 billion.

But wait! I have an idea that will resurrect the sinking brew faster than the firm can blow the head off  its “New Coke” promotional disaster.

Are you ready Anheuser Busch? Grab a piece of paper and a pencil and write this down: “Tucker Carlson!”

Tucker is a guy’s kind of guy. Every red-blooded American male would like to have a beer with the likeable outspoken conservative commentator. He had the largest cable news audience in America until Fox, in a Bud Light marketing moment, unceremoniously sacked him.

Bud light had the largest selling beer among men in the U.S. and destroyed that in less than a week while Fox blew up its number one cable rating numbers in just a day.

The marriage of Bud Light and Tucker Carlson is a marketing match made in heaven.

Slap a picture of Tucker on Bud Light cans and the beer’s branding problems are over. They may lose the transgender crowd, but how many of them even drink the stuff? None. They represent less than 0.0001 percent of the population if that. What’s Bud Light got left to lose?

Oh, they’ll lose Democrats. But Democrats don’t buy beer. They demand that others buy it for them or that the breweries give it to them.

The company’s only hurdle now is convincing Tucker. He won’t come cheap, but neither was tanking one of the best selling beer brands in America.

As for Fox News, maybe they can convince Bill O’Reilly to come back. Otherwise, that 8 p.m. weekday slot will continue to hemorrhage viewers.

You’re welcome Anheuser Busch. The invoice is in the mail.

(An abridged version of my above commentary appears in the BPR Biz Pac Review at  https://www.bizpacreview.com/2023/05/11/could-tucker-revive-the-flatlining-bud-brand-1358089/ )

***

Speaking Of Beer Going Flat: Anheuser-Busch InBev took another hit Wednesday, May 10, as an analyst at HSBC downgraded the beverage giant’s stock from “buy” to “hold” due to the ongoing Bud Light brand crisis. HSBC warned investors there were “deeper problems than ABI admits.”

***

A $5 Hot Dog And A $500 Seat: Colleen Angel, the hard-working entrepreneur who owns South 8th Street’s Amelia’s Best Barbershop and Hillbilly Hot Dogs, did a brisk business this past Shrimp Festival.

However, customers to Ms. Angel’s Hillbilly Hot Dog “snack shack” at 401 South 8th  had to be careful not to trip over Fernandina Beach’s code enforcement employees who were seem swarming all over the entrepreneur’s business several times this past weekend taking photos, writing notes, and looking puzzled.

The city is determined to fine Ms. Angel or close down her Hillbilly Hot Dog business. They say she has to cough up a $500 impact fee for each seat on her property, at one time telling her she had to pay $4,000 in “impact fees” for a wooden bench they say seats eight people or get rid of it.

A shrewd business person, Ms. Angel figured that since the city says the benches were worth that much, she would add them to her store’s inventory and sell them. Folks seeking to buy benches or tables can stop by her place between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. for one of the more than 20 varieties of hot dogs ranging in price from $5 to $18, a $3 biscuit and gravy plate, a burrito, a hamburger, fried fish sandwich, etc. and try out one of the $550 bench seats she is now selling.

A $550 Hillbilly bench

An apparently perplexed city code enforcement crew stopped by at least three times taking notes and snapping photos of the benches says Ms. Angel.

In a  series of opinion editorials skewering the city in the bi-weekly print News Leader, local residents Pat Keogh and Glen Stettler have labeled the town “Shakedown City” because of its heavy-handed tactics and exorbitant fee structure, in particular its dealings with Ms. Angel. In some cases, the pair explain in their commentary, the fees are 550 percent higher than the exact same fees in the county for the exact same service.

The duo say that this long-time extortion of local businesses like Ms. Angel’s won’t stop until state law enforcement agencies intervene and bring it to a halt. And they are advocating for that to happen.

The city has been successfully sued twice in the past over this same issue and is currently facing a close to $500,000 suit by a local builder and developer. It is reportedly negotiating a settlement.

The city’s only defense say Keogh and Stettler, is to continue litigating, hoping to drain the plaintiffs financially. Essentially the city is using tax payer money to sue the tax payer to keep them from getting any of their extorted tax money back. The mob would be very envious of such a scheme.

Using these tactics city consigliere Tammi Bach and her Code Enforcement hench men are a cinch for the Criminal Enterprise Hall of Fame.

If f you are a local businessperson who has experienced or currently experiencing a shakedown by the city contact Stettler at gjstettler1@verizon.net or Keogh at pkeogh1@comcast.net. Or let me know at davidnscott@bellsouth.net. We will only use your information only after you have given us permission to do so.

***

Trump Or DeSantis? Amelia Island is fortunate to host an amazing number of highly respected, informative and well-known authors, pundits, and commentators, some retired and others still scribbling.

Neal Freeman

One of the most admired and esteemed on a national level is former National Review editor and columnist Neal Freeman, who has also authored two books and was the founding producer of Firing Line.

As the scramble for the GOP Republican Presidential nomination heats up Neal recently penned a National Review piece analyzing Governor Ron DeSantis’ chances at securing that slot saying he’s “on the rebound” in a spectacular way.

Neal cited the governor’s recent legislative victories writing in his May 6 piece:

“The Florida legislature wrapped up its 60-day session on Friday after compiling a breathtaking record of conservative accomplishment. Tort reform. School choice. Tax relief. A pushback on ESG from the pension system and CRT from the classroom. Bans on Chinese land purchases and “reassignment” surgery for minors. Serious efforts to lower drug prices without crimping research incentives, and to impose the death penalty more frequently for heinous crimes. All that and more. “

The “more” includes DeSantis also shepherding the state’s Republican majority to pass bills allowing people to carry concealed weapons without permits; a crackdown on illegal immigration, secured restrictions on drag shows and on spending on college diversity programs while limiting the use of  preferred pronouns in K-12 schools.

To read Neal’s informative and analytical piece go to www.nationalreview.com/corner/the-desantis-rebound-begins-now/

On the Donald Trump side of the political ledger historian, author and pundit Victor Davis Hanson makes a strong case for the former President citing his accomplishments in his book “The Case for Trump,” that covers the first half of  his presidency.

Hanson cites Trump’s “massive deregulation, stepped up energy production, tax cuts, increased border enforcement, near-record low minority unemployment, a strong stock market and low inflation rates.” In foreign affairs he highlights Trump’s middle east Abraham accords.

From where I sit and from what I’ve heard, the GOP race appears to be between DeSantis, who has yet to announce, and Trump, who keeps gaining steam despite or because of Democrats attacking him through the courts.

All the other announced candidates appear to me to be running for vice president for either DeSantis or Trump.

***

A Caution Sign: The local pride organization hereabouts may want to take a look at a situation that occurred on Treasure Coast in southeast Florida this past week.

A Florida LGBTQ+ group there called off its gay pride parade scheduled for this weekend, citing a change in the political climate due to a new bill penalizing those who expose children to “lewd” sexually orientated content and is expected to soon be signed into law by Governor Ron DeSantis.

On Tuesday, May 2, the local pride group swarmed Fernandina Beach City Hall Commission Chambers advocating for its annual Central Park pride festival and parade through town. Folks opposed to certain pride events conducted within sight of children or aimed at them also spoke out.

I’m not saying that the local pride contingent is planning on conducting lewd displays. But the recent events in Treasure Coast should set off alarm bells for the Fernandina crowd to be extra cautious during their planned events.

The parade out of Florida’s Treasure Coast Pride festival, an annual celebration of the LGBTQ+ community, was canceled after a bill prohibiting kids from attending obscene adult performances was passed by the state’s House on April 19.

The Pride Alliance of the Treasure Coast, which organizes the event, announced that other pride events would now be 21-and-older events.

The Pride Alliance of the Treasure Coast announced that its parade would not take place after having multiple conversations with Port St. Lucie officials and other events during Pridefest would be restricted to those 21 years old and older.

***

Things I Wish I’d Said:  “Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.” – Steven Wright.

  • Comment (60)
  • How long does it take to eat a hot dog, drink a beer and say hi to your friends? Put up as many “standing tables” as you have room for and voila! Problem solved.

    • With respect… not the point. The charges are illegal and need to be justified by the city and they can’t. Any business should not be required to be creative in order to avoid an illegal charge by “shakedown city”.

      What’s required is for the city to stop viewing our businesses as marks from which to extricate illegal gains. Even though they keep getting sued for the same behavior, they won’t stop or even admit wrong doing. Some of our commissioners even applaud this behavior while looking the other way telling us this never happens. All this occurs while the city attorney lies to them, gives them cover to keep operating the money making racket. Our Commissioners, and Mayor, would have you believe they can’t read and need the City Manager to decipher for them.

      State intervention is the only remedy to stop the “Mob” behavior. Not a feel good work shop to tell the citizens “we are okay here, you just don’t get it”. We get it, business needs to kiss the ring of the Mob Boss City and not get out of line. Hey it’s worked for years, even Ross figured that part out.

      • Why should Ms. Angel not be subjected to the same rules that apply to other businesses? Is she somehow being singled out and treated differently?

    • I support Ms Angel, getting my conservative regular military style haircut at her establishment. We discussed her issues with the city on Tuesday. I seriously doubt 8 code enforcement officials can sit at her picnic table at one time.

      • I don’t understand why you think the type of haircut you prefer is relevant, however, your post explains the hair I found in my hotdog the one time I tried one at Ms. Angel’s establishment.

        • Greg you’re trying too hard. It’s obvious what you’re doing. I read your other comments. You have an association with a different hot dog place and you’re trying to destroy the competition. You didn’t find a hair and if you did you wouldn’t be here knocking yourself out to destroy Angel’s reputation. Use the same energy to make your business or someone else’s business better.

  • Dave:

    Better yet maybe the Bud Light folks could engage the Shakedown City thugs. They seem to be doing a great job promoting Colleen’s businesses. By the way, the Shakedown City muscle scored almost $900,000 in illegal fees on the local developer mark.

  • I don’t think we want DeSantis running for President for two reasons:
    (1) He can serve one more term as Governor and benefit our State even more than he has. Why would we want to surrender that?
    (2) We need Trump in office to fix the election fraud (if that’s possible, which I question since they could steal that big a landslide, I think we’re down to the ammo box to correct that).
    ADITIONALLY, the combination of Trump as President and DeSantis as Governor would make the perfect launch-pad for DeSantis to take over after Trump and continue his policies while adding his.

    • Certainly you also think that there would be a place in the new POTUS’ cabinet for the likes of Jim Jordan, MTG, Matt Gaetz, Lauren Bobert and George Santos? Maybe even Tucker?

    • I voted for Trump twice. I will never vote for him again. He is as crooked as the DemoRATS who hate him. I also believe Ron DeSantis should remain in Florida until he is term limited. Senile Demented Buffoon Joe “Brandon” Biden is a pathetic POTUS but the DemoRATS will keep voting for him because they want him to this nation into the land of progressives and queers while allowing our children to switch genders without the knowledge of the parents. Who ever is pulling the strings for his lousy presidency needs to be exposed for the crooks they are. I just hope someone runs on the conservative side that has a chance of beating the current POS in office and can restore sanity to this nation.

      • Here is what is going to happen: 1. Trump will obliterate DeSantis in the primaries because Ron is weak and he is a moron. 2. Trump will lose again against Biden, but it will be much worse and embarrassing the second time.

          • The polls may be wrong but they show a strong lead for Trump against DeSantis and a victory for Biden against Trump. So, Trump will win the Republican primaries against DeSantis, and lose the general election against Biden. In the general election, DeSantis would do better against Biden than Trump, but DeSantis won’t make it that far because Republicans want the original shade or orange. It’s good for America though, because you know, Trump attempted a coup, and DeSantis has taken away freedoms from Floridians more than any governor in history, so both are really bad hombres that we don’t want to see in the White House.

        • “I think we’re down to the ammo box to correct that.”

          This is the type obscenity that our kids need to be protected from.

          • AGREED! Sickening comment. Glad the Proud Boys got what they deserved. Trump to follow!

        • Blow Angel, I think George was referring to your reply in his comment below – communist don’t believe in freedom of speech.

          • (btw not talking to you, Greg, apologies for the confusion – I was responding to George and his buddies)

          • Chris: You have had nine opportunities here to express your opinions. Your repeated grievances and attacks on others here indicate you may have a mental short circuit in your understanding of how people that think or talk about issues with which you disagree. I limit comments here to three. I appreciate that you think you are leading me and many readers here out of the mud of our insensitivities and backward thinking with you moral superiority. Your comments reveal that you think we are racist homophobic boobs whose venomous attitudes must be silenced, vilified and punished. Your tired vintage faculty-lounge self-righteousness is infantile in its irrational hatred. You have run out of gas except to call for more socialism, open borders, gender-free restrooms, the elimination of family values, education reform, etc. and attacking those who who champion traditional western values, fair trade and otherwise don’t think as you do. You are welcome to continue to comment in future blogs but limit yourself to three and no more.

          • Do you believe in freedom of speech? Last time I checked you were in favor of censoring and cancelling a pride event, which is protected under the first amendment. Or maybe you are communist? You call everybody a communist, but I may have missed the part where you said you were one yourself.

  • i am beginning to feel as if the United States of America has gone coocoo.

    • Well yeah. It started with Reagan in the 80s’, and things go worse with Newt in the 90s’. That circus started 40 years ago. It’s probably coming to an end though as people now realize that the GOP has gone bananas.

      • You must be straight out of the DemoRATS playbook. Open your eyes man and see what the idiot in the WH is doing to this nation. If you can’t see the truth I’m sure it can be pointed out to you.

        • I am in awe of your remarkable brilliance. Your ability to make astonishingly improbable deductions based on the tiniest fragments of information is truly unparalleled. With a mind sharper than that of Monk or Sherlock, you effortlessly piece together intricate puzzles, leaving me astounded at your sheer intellect. Your exceptional talent for unraveling mysteries and uncovering hidden truths is nothing short of extraordinary. In your presence, I cannot help but feel captivated by your unparalleled deductive prowess. You are an intellectual marvel, a true genius, and I am honored to witness your extraordinary abilities firsthand.

          • I do support Trump or nor have I ever subscribed to Truth Social. The choice in 2024 is simple. More of the Same records police’s or sanity in the White House by another choice,

  • I thought the last election solved the problem of a seemingly corrupt city council leaving only the physician with oral diarrhea turned to whining about his lack of ability to bully the others. If the election was not a hoax then these members can put a stop to the code enforcement bullies and the city attorney who appears to be straight out of The Denney Crain School of Law. A message to the council: Do the job you were elected to and solve the city fleecing the citizens and business owners.

  • I thought the last election solved the problem of a seemingly corrupt city council leaving only the physician with oral diarrhea turned to whining about his lack of ability to bully the others. If the election was not a hoax then these members can put a stop to the code enforcement bullies and the city attorney who appears to be straight out of The Denney Crain School of Law. A message to the council: Do the job you were elected to and solve the city fleecing the citizens and business owners.

    • Seems a simple remedy, or should be. But yet it isn’t. Not a secret why. They won’t give up the “Control” and access to the slush fund. Kiss the ring and behave.

      Our current Mayor presents himself better but yet won’t make a difference. It takes more than a video of a minute with the Mayor to stop the corruption. And it continues. He could look like a hero, but it’s easier to smile and hold a meeting than to admit he knows the depth of the corruption that has been committed. It’s all enabled by our City Attorney and they look at her for a wave of approval (cover) . Then they continue the fleecing of our citizens. Ms Bach knows full well what’s going on and she enables the activity.

  • The local pride festival is a family-friendly event. No sexual or obscene content there. No need to worry. No drag show either. So it’s all good then, right? Will you stop talking so much about something that doesn’t affect you? What’s your problem exactly? Someone is doing something that doesn’t affect you in any way, but because you hate gays and trans you want it canceled? Why do you hate queer folks so much? You don’t like freedom? Or do you envy them? Do you feel threatened by them, as a man? Are your ego and your masculinity that fragile? What’s your deal, seriously bro? You need to chill.

    • It would seem there must be some form of obscene material/acts in the local PRIDE event or they wouldn’t have cancelled it? Right? Where’s all the bravado, “We’re here, we’re queer get used to it” gone? Your misplaced and faux outrage towards people that don’t want their children exposed to “alternative” lifestyles is laughable. Let’s get it straight, nobody really cares about your sexual preference or lifestyle, so why do you feel the need to put it on parade for the rest of us?

      As far as the difference between one form of trauma and the other, I’d rather have neither… Gun control only “controls” the law abiding gun owners. So sure, let’s have the criminals and the murderers have the unregulated access to weapons and the people who would defend us from those animals can kick rocks. Right?

      • The parade and festival are protected under the first amendment and permits were approved and will be honored by the local government. Nothing happens during that short event that is not protected by the U.S. Constitution. The motivation for the event does not concern you, but you keep saying it is about you, and really, the only way this event could possibly be about you if you are a member or an ally of the LGBTQIA+ community. So it sounds like the only faux-outrage here is yours. You need to calm way down. Peace, brother.

        • Awwww, Chris you made me blush. You wrote me a poem. How sweet. I’m glad my name has so many rhyming options for you… LOL

        • I guess you have a reading comprehension issue. I’m not bothered by your infantile attempts at baiting people into some fake outrage over a stupid parade… LMAO

          • In a world of projection, there’s a man named Fred,
            He claims he comprehends, yet he’s lost in his own maze.
            But oh, his antics, they’ll make you shake your head!

            He accuses others of outrage, it’s what he’s led,
            Blinded by his own fake displays.
            In a world of projection, there’s a man named Fred.

            He scoffs at parades, calls them stupid instead,
            But he’s the one prancing, causing the disarray,
            Oh, his antics, they’ll make you shake your head!

            Original thoughts? Cleverness? They’ve all fled,
            His mind is a screen, playing someone else’s craze.
            In a world of projection, there’s a man named Fred.

            Like an Epson Home Cinema, he projects widespread,
            His foolishness shines bright, captivating the gaze.
            Oh, his antics, they’ll make you shake your head!

            So let’s laugh and jest, let the silliness spread,
            For Fred, the projector, lost in his own daze.
            In a world of projection, there’s a man named Fred,
            Oh, his antics, they’ll make you shake your head!

    • Haven’t you been paying attention? It’s about the children. Meanwhile, the leading cause of death among children and teens is attributable to ….. GUNS! Take your pick: gun violence or witnessing a cross-dresser. Want to take a stab at which one is far more likely to result in significant – and often permanent – physical and mental trauma? Which of course begs the question: How many of those protesting certain books, DEI, and CRT in schools, along with spouting anti-LGBTQ rhetoric are putting as much effort into supporting sensible gun control? You know, the thing actually HARMING and KILLING children.

  • Who are the code enforcement hench men? Last I heard there are two females and one male in code enforcement. They didn’t pound other people with impact fees but in different situations their devious tactics were just as bad- they sound like a sneaky crew. If the city attorney engages in weak minded unconscionable acts and then she should be fired along with the rest of them. We shouldn’t be forking the bill for their low brow antics.

    • Perhaps other establishments are simply following the rules that should apply evenly to all? Personally, I would prefer to get my hotdogs from the Hot Dog House or one of the many other food service establishments on the Island. The thought of this lady rubbing some guy’s neck or whatever else the Blow Angel offers before making food is repulsive. I hope the health department is her next visitor.

        • You got that right. Out of line and ridiculous! Angel doesn’t cut hair and go straight to the food. If she’s smart enough to squash code enforcement’s swarming schemes then I’m sure she knows how to wash her hands thoroughly before serving food.

      • Maybe but that doesn’t take away from code enforcement’s dark side. Don’t count on them to apply rules evenly… all you have to do is talk to people who’ve dealt with them. Dave is on point. Glen is on point. Stan hit it. Low brow. I’ve heard the city solicitor Tammi Bach say that her role is to prevent lawsuits for the city. Is that so? She doesn’t seem to do her job. Commissioners, wake up and open your eyes.
        We’ve been to the Hot Dog House a few times and I’d say they make a tasty dog but Hillbilly’s is right up there with them. Fernandina is a growing city, there’s no reason both can’t succeed.

  • Dave Scott: Whoever this Chris guy, he is violating your 3 reply rule. Please apply the rule evenly.

    • Ummm, that rule was for specific people that weren’t contributing to the discussion and trying to bully others into silence. Not the same thing Harry… JS

      • Dave’s blog, Dave’s rules. If you don’t like them, take your opinion elsewhere. Or contribute something useful!

        • First thing you’ve ever written that I can agree with, however, canceling Chris just underscores what Glen said last week- this blog is just one big circle jerk. Chris happens to be an excellent writer and he has stirred up some controversy and that leads to conversation and understanding. Is this any different or less appropriate than what Dave does by intentionally writing highly offensive comments that are critical of anyone left of the far right with the intention of inciting anger and hatred towards us from his mostly proletariat followers?

          • I have no problem with Chris’ comment and opinions. I read conservative and liberal blogs (Citizens Journal and Fernandina Observer, etc.). The problem that Dave addressed was one person constantly dominating his blog. Last week, Chris piped in on Thursday with 6 or more responses to others comments. This week, as Dave noted, he has commented or replied to 9 out of 45 comments (20%).

  • Somewhere was a comment about Mayor Bean. I doubt he will be reelected. 1. He does not seem to like controversy which means we will get no meaningful results. You’ll just get the same ole pictures, event attendance and lip service, etc. 2. He seems to take sides with the people he knows personally over what’s ethical. That includes his neighbor and political friends. 3. He tells constituents who go to him with problems that he will look into it and get back to them but from what I found out recently is that he rarely does unless it benefits him. This has been the case with people who aren’t close to him but have known him his entire life. 4. He lacks the necessary leadership to take control of serious problems that need fast results. I think many of his votes at the commission meetings are more about what’s best for him than anyone else. My family is very sorry we voted for him. So disappointing.

    • Thank you for sharing your regrets on a venue where other individuals that voted for Bean are likely to come across your thoughts. I agree but, for me to say it, I would immediately be accused of being partisan.

    • He’s been elected and re-elected. When did you realize that he lacked these leadership qualities?

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