Musings, opinions, observations, questions, and random thoughts on island life, Fernandina Beach and more

Musings, opinions, observations, questions, and random thoughts on island life, Fernandina Beach and more

Comedians Today Aren’t Funny -They’re Mean & Vulgar

Humor on TV, in movies, and on the stage isn’t funny anymore. It’s become cruel, mean and vulgar.

I haven’t seen or heard anything “funny” in a long time that I’d be comfortable escorting my grandson, neighborhood kids or someone’s Quaker granny to hear or see.

Funny people like Carol Burnett, Dick Van Dyke, Bob Newhart, and Mel Brooks are all in their 80s or early 90s. Equally hilarious performers such as Victor Borge, Bob Hope, Jack Benny, Don Rickles, Milton Berle, Jonathan Winters, Gilda Radner, Johnny Carson, and Sid Caesar have passed away.

One of the funniest — Jerry Seinfeld — is still around, but rarely makes an appearance anymore. A co-star on his wildly hilarious TV show, “Seinfeld”, Julie Louis-Dreyfus, is still active and if today’s comedians adopted her philosophy of : “I have no agenda except to be funny. Neither I or the writers profess to offer any worldly wisdom,” then comedy might once again be a laughing matter.

The left entertains its own, and has used its domination of TV, films, and the stage to create a world in which women can’t bear wearing tops; waltz around nude and abort babies; people have sex without consequences; and then make fun of those who don’t do the same.

By openly admitting that they are immoral creeps, weasels, and anti-American philanderers, they avoid being labeled hypocrites. So why do they get so angry when the right takes their comments and actions in context? That’s one of the key difference between conservatives and liberals. Conservatives get upset when they’re not quoted accurately. Liberals get upset when they are.

The leftist ideology of political correctness has implemented a sort of unwritten code of comedy requiring deference to the sensitivities of a mollycoddled generation of snowflakes seeking safe places from which to poke their rightwing “tormentors” in the eye.

To them funny stuff is only funny when the punch lines involve people — white and religious — who in their eyes have been rigging the game for years to exploit folks darker or feminine. The left’s comedians bully people from a stage with their veiled class bigotry that to them is knee-slapping hilarious and aisle-rolling funny.

Watching the anti-Trump shtick by late night TV performers is like listening to the keynote speaker at an ISIS awards banquet telling jokes about Benjamin Netanyahu.

A Trump version of “Julius Caesar” running as the “Shakespeare in the Park” production in New York City’s Central Park is an example. Caesar wears a business suit with a long necktie and, tweets from a gold tub, and has a bushy reddish-blond haircut. His wife, Calpurnia, speaks with a Slavic accent, which some reports say sounds more like a Bronx Yiddish inflection.

The socialist British newspaper The Guardian, described the play’s Trump assassination plot as “taking a somewhat lighter touch with their Trump resistance themes.” A lighter touch? Trump being stabbed to death like a pincushion with blood spurting everywhere? Delta Airlines, America Express and Bank of America apparently didn’t think it was so light hearted as they pulled their funding following the first performance.

In addition to a play glorifying the murder of the President, we have vile rap videos, watch as the left applauds unrepentant terrorists like Bill Ayers and invite onetime Puerto Rican convicted terror leader Oscar Lopez Rivera to head a New York City parade and they order cops at left-wing universities to stand back and allow violent students to riot, threaten and disrupt conservative speakers. Is it any wonder the Democrats keep losing elections.

However, in its extreme politically correct environment to get a laugh in their crowd they’re obliged to tip toe around certain sensitive groups including blacks (black comedians get a pass here), Asians, Hispanics, illegal aliens, liberals, college snowflakes, gays, women (except Ann Coulter and Sarah Palin, who are always fair game), transgendered people, convicted felons, Islamic terrorists, midget gay porn movie actors, and cross dressing French oboists.

A key exception is a group known as conservative white people, particularly southern white people, who earn a living performing highly skilled and difficult laborious craftsman type work such as plumbing, carpentry, welding, shrimping, brick laying, landscaping, farming, etc. Oh, and if they happen to be Christians it’s full speed ahead, let ’em have it with both barrels of that lampoon scattershot. And if they’re evangelical, call in the heavy artillery.

All of these hard working folks are fair game and the left says it’s always open season on ’em. Hillary Clinton tossed them all into her “basket of deplorables” and Barack Obama accused them of “clinging to guns and religion.” Late night TV comedians, who have all the charm of an obscene Easter card, would be mute without them to ridicule.

But despite being the target of the abuse being hurled at them from the left they shrug it off and go about their business. You don’t hear them complaining saying: “Hey, I’m a doublewide Florida panhandle white trash, God-fearing, beer swilling drywall guy, and I’m sick and tired of those yahoos on TV making fun of me.” Nope, they don’t do that.

They flat out don’t give a rip. They wear the insults as a badge of honor. And I bet that just irritates the Dickens out of those pretentious, cruel gasbags like Bill Maher, Stephen Colbert, Alec Baldwin, Kathy Griffin, Joy Behar, Rosie O’Donnell, etc., people who wouldn’t recognize the milk of human kindness if they drank a cow.

And none of these liberal funny folks dare throw their barbs within close proximity of their targets. Nope. They know better than to get within a hundred miles of guys named Snake, Bubba or Weasel when hurling insults in their direction at the Clay County Fair. For their own safety they don’t exhibit the same kind of risk-taking or selfishness they display on national TV when in close proximity to their targets. If they did show up you might hear several objects of their jokes say to their buddies as they headed toward the stage: “Hold my beer and watch this.”

Being ignored is a horrible fate for these self-righteous glitterati. Ask the snobbish, pretty girl in high school who didn’t get asked to the prom, the standup comedian from New York who can’t get a laugh at an Ole Miss frat house, or the newscasters whose ratings tanked because their bias broadcasts are anticipated and repetitious. Bankrupt and long-gone Air America and MSNBC’s three remaining viewers are examples. The New York Times sagging circulation numbers and sinking advertising revenues speak for themselves.

Poking fun at mom’s apple-pie-America and her sons and daughters isn’t good for business or careers. And it certainly doesn’t generate votes for the group poking ’em.

This is not a group of folks that’ll be invited on a USO tour anytime soon as I’m sure this collection of sad sacks doesn’t want to perform in front of an audience of American soldiers armed to the teeth.

For the same reasons I’ve never seen any of them do their shtick on the Grand Ole Opry, at a professional wrestling match, NASCAR, or during the Alabama-Auburn halftime show.

With the exception of a few lost, confused liberal performers who accidently wander into a Wal-Mart or local barbeque joint, they really have never met or chatted with their targeted white southern conservatives, religious or otherwise. It’s easier and more comfortable to attack or demonize them from their insulated TV studios in Los Angeles and New York. I suspect not much will change in the near future to tamper the contempt of these so-called comedians who bully for sport.

However, the “deplorables” and “gun and religion clingers” got the last laugh at the ballot box in November with an unexpected punch line that the left didn’t find amusing.


Speaking Of Humor: I was saddened to read the other day that Austin-American Statesman newspaper humor columnist John Kelso died at 73.

Kelso was a guy, who over a couple of beers many years ago in Austin told me: “The true definition of a Yankee is a person who thinks 100 miles is too far to drive for good barbecue.”

John was a nice guy and a funny guy and he will be missed.


The I Didn’t Know That Was Edible Department: I often see items listed on menus and have no idea what they are. For example I spotted specials at a new local eatery this past weekend that baffled me so I’ve decided to list them and then add my own definitions of what they could be:

Bok Choy: Name of a power hitting Japanese baseball player.

Taso Brado: An Italian stripper renown for her twirling tassels trick.

Radiatore: What happens when the fan belt on your car radiator breaks.

Crostini: An angry dwarf.

Millfwee: How much it’ll cost to repair your car radiator.


The Lawyers Win Again Department: Fernandina Beach has lost an appeal of a summary judgment that had been rendered in its favor in Oregon with the matter referred back to the district court for trial. So far, the city has paid about $80,000 in legal fees to attorneys in Oregon over a $20,000 bill for playground equipment it paid to a sales rep rather than the manufacturer. We would have been better off if the city paid both the sales rep and the manufacturer $20K each, a savings of $40K. The city’s insurance carrier says there’s no coverage for the claim and isn’t obligated to provide legal defense leaving tax payers on the hook for the city’s big mistake.


Drinking, Dining & Dancing: Being sent to the Principal’s Office will be a trip to look forward to after Jacksonville business partners Sam Van Voorhis and Spence Romine finish converting the historic 1886-built school house they just purchased at 914 Atlanta in Fernandina Beach and make it into a 17-room boutique hotel with a pool and bar called “The Principal’s Office.” Work on the three million dollar renovation project should be done by summer next year say the pair who also own boutique hotels in Anna Maria, FL, Sedona, AZ, and South Lake Tahoe, CA. I’ve noticed the construction work but alert reader Tom Yankus went there and reported back that the Palms Fish Camp Restaurant at 6359 Heckscher Drive re-opened three weeks ago after 14 years of legal hassles. Tom, who actually dined there, cites bargains such as a $7.95 half pound of huge Mayport shrimp, whole Vermillion snapper, Lane snapper, red grouper, and pan seared scallops on the menu when he was there and a two-for-one happy hour along with $8.00 buckets of five 16-ounce PBRs. The Palms is just one bridge before Chowder Ted’s, and has indoor and outdoor seating with a full-service tiki bar, boat dock and kayak launch along Clapboard Creek. The place is leased for 20 years from the city of Jacksonville by attorney Marc Hardesty and his partners, Marshall Adkison, owner of Adkison Towing, and Jay McKenzie, owner of the Sandollar Restaurant on Heckscher Drive, located a few miles north of the Palms. In a report in the Jacksonville Daily Record Hardesty said: “What sets us apart is our fresh, local seafood like Mayport shrimp we buy right here on Heckscher Drive and we only book local bands.”  Hardesty added: “It’s also one of the few places where you can tie up your boat or kayak or Jet Ski and come in for lunch or dinner.” He also said that they added a wood-fired pizza oven making it possibly the only place on Heckscher Drive to get a pizza. During a visit with friends Bob Ramshaw, Jeff McDowell and Robin Sylvester at the Main Beach Sandbar Restaurant Sunday afternoon, one of the owners, Kevin Dooner, suggested we try his “specialty hamburger” and allowed us each to sample a quarter of one. Folks, this may possibly be the most unusual burger I have ever eaten as it included honey sriracha sauce and peanut butter on the bottom half of the bun and grape jelly with thick crispy bacon on the top. It’s not on the menu so you have to ask for it and it’s priced at $15.00, $2.50 more than the regular menu-listed burger. Both come with a side. Does it qualify for the Fat Men From Space tasting? No. But it sure does merit a special category which the two Fat Men and I have decided to create for just such oddball designer burgers as this tasty creation. This evening from 6-9 p.m. the Horizons restaurant will feature drummer Les DeMerle and his songstress wife Bonnie Eisele at 5472 First Coast Hwy. Reservations are suggested so call ’em at 904/ 321-2430. Also tonight is the 6-8 p.m. Sounds on Centre in downtown Fernandina Beach featuring Fernandina’s teen band Flipturn playing rock and alternative tunes for all you folks that like to lay back and just listen or dance in the street.

  • Comment (16)
  • “Cruel, mean and vulgar…immoral creeps, weasels, and anti-American philanderers.” Sounds like you’re talking about Trump.

  • When you assign people to groups you are acting as bad as the people you are talking about.
    Just because people think differently then you doesn’t make them vulgar, or stupid. Some of the comedy is funny, Trump sets himself up so very often, but some isn’t funny, it’s cruel, and some of your comments and name calling come across the same way. Personally I think Trump and his family are putting all of us down thinking we will believe anything they say, and then correct, over and over again. Most of their problems could be avoided if they would just tell the truth from the beginning. Don’t you get tired of all the corrections? I forgot, someone else filed the forms, alternative facts, and on and on. Respect has to be earned, no matter what side of the aisle you’re on…..

  • As always,it just depends on which side of the aisle you cater to.Humor at the expense of someone’s sense of well being isn’t funny.But,try telling that to those late night idiots that pretend to be comedians.

  • Jeff Foxworth sets himself apart from what has become the norm today for many comedians. He never ventures past G-rated entertainment. Back in the 1990’s, as Principal of a Forsyth County elementary school, Jeff was present at my school watching his niece and nephew performing at school plays.

  • Dave, I also miss Phil Silvers, Jackie Gleason and Steve Allen (albeit a democrat).

    Your point about bathroom/hurtful humor was obviously lost on some who read your column. Political sarcasm is enjoyable up to the point where it is used like a sledge hammer against an opponents’ beliefs in a jackhammer style designed to destroy not only the views of the opponents but the person themselves. It is no wonder we have the candidates we have these days for critical offices. What normal person would subject themselves, and their families and associates, to the outrageous torment bestowed by a bunch of mental gnats.

  • Inculcate ;to implant by repeated statement or admonition; teach persistently and earnestly (usually followed by upon or in): to inculcate virtue 2. to cause or influence (someone) to accept an idea or doctrine without question.
    I do believe that comments ,already posed, by some individuals suffer from this rare disease inculcation ,of responding with out hope of serious dialogue or discussion. Another word comes to mind, assimilation. If you are fully inculcated you can not fully assimilate new ideas.

  • Back in the 1970s there was a very funny guy named Dave Scott who worked for me in Atlanta. Dave consistently mocked public figures all across the political persuasion. Dave was merciless in his humorous commentary and satirical remarks. Is it possible that the writer of this blog is the same person?

  • As a person that has a lot of liberal views I am going to agree with more then you might think regarding your weekly rant. However, I do not agree that there is not good comedy anymore. There is every type of comedy you could ever want in all styles available. It is much like music. I turn on the radio and I can’t find a single thing I think isn’t garbage. 15 years ago this was really a problem but today we have an unbelievable resource in the internet which allows me to listen to any style, any artist, any time. It is truly amazing. You can find comedy in the same way. Your issue is that the main corporate media, is playing the same comedy record over and over. I am sorry I don’t like it either but when you let 4-5 networks put out all the information you are consuming you are destined to be unhappy. As to the angry unfunny nastiness of it.. that is being heaped on the current administration…. and those that appear to be consorting with and supporting it. I believe you are generally correct. It is over the top, mean spirited and I do not agree with much of it. I am amazed that the major studios play so blatantly to 50% of the populace. I can’t imagine someone like you watching the late show. It is so left politically.. they are for the most part calling you an idiot. Unfortunately we have come to a bad place in this country really culminating with the election of Trump. I believe the moment he won the election the liberal left essentially declared war on him. That is the situation, so I will give you that. Of course the flip side is he is a dangerous incompetent who should be removed from office immediately. There is no need for me to recite the endless crazy stuff he does daily, we all know it. So I believe that is where we are at. The liberals control the press and are at war with a crazy man in the white house. We need you and other republicans to step up and pull the plug on this guy. I believe that is the situation and I doubt things will get better until he is gone.

  • Dave – You are part of the problem with your analysis of today’s “humor”. Hurts when the barbs hit home – and you rise to the bait. It’s the difference between “insight” and “incite”. It’s easy to incinerate. It’s not easy to build. Being “clever” is easy. Being wise is harder.
    Sadly. There is much at stake.

  • The sad thing is, what if Hillary had been elected? Would the news media stop praising every stupid thing she did? Anything the liberal media thought was a good cause, she would follow. We had a choice in November of two really poor candidates. The least poor won so suck it up and accept that we elected the least bad candidate. I find all the rhetoric from the news media boring and extremely divisive. I found Barack Obama extremely divisive and his rule by edict not what this country was founded upon. I did vote for Mr. Obama the first term and found my mistake. We do need a better president but I prefer we do it by voting in 2020 not by the howling and misinformation from the liberal media. We never elected them to anything.

  • John, I am afraid we can not wait for 2020 based on the antics of the current president. There is actually something wrong with this guy. I am not saying this because I do not like his political policies. Which I do not. I probably like Mike Pence’s policies even less but honestly, as a liberal. I’d be willing to let it go and just admit the republicans won. The Trump thing however, I can’t abide by. I think this is only going to end in some real nightmare for our country or at the very least for the republican party. In some ways that would be fine in my book, but not this way. Not to the point of making our country a laughing stock of the world or having an unhinged guy in charge. I mean just look at any one thing he has done. Take the phone calls that were just released yesterday. Honestly, would you or anyone you know given the job of most powerful person in the world, talking to our good allies for the first time…say anything like that. Honestly, I do not even know you and I am going to say there would be a 99% chance you would have approached those calls better. We can’t have this stuff. Come on, the republicans are in charge. We (everyone) is counting on republicans to make sure the ship does not go way off course and right now it is not looking good. Crickets from republicans. Get rid of him, put Pence in. All you right wingers will be served so much better.

  • Dave,suggest you initiate a maximum number of words for commenters to your blog.This one guy goes on and on and repeats himself so much it is boring.Maybe he should write his own blog.
    Suggest how my heroine,Hillary Clinton blew the election as a title.

  • I had been looking forward to the opening of the Palms Fish Camp. Last Friday my wife and I stopped by for lunch. The blasting music almost caused me not to enter. I decided to the Fish Tacos, a favorite dish of mine. They were wrapped in taco shells – but there the resemblance ended. There were no fish chunks, only a few bits the size of almond slices and smaller. The greenery was wildly inappropriate. No management was in evidence. I won’t be going back there.

  • Hey, “conservative white people” have always been easy to target for “insightful” (thanks, Robert Warner above) political humor. They elected a clown for president and find it hard to understand why the new administration is a circus! Ya just can’t make this stuff up!!!


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