Fernandina’s top cop, Police Chief Jeffery Tambasco, took his unintended stand-up comedy routine public and attracted the attention of local resident, internationally acclaimed author, and columnist Ken Timmerman.
Last week after observing the chief speak prior to a Menorah lighting in a downtown Fernandina Beach pocket park Ken satirically wrote: “Breaking News! Fernandina Beach Chief of Police Jeffrey Tambasco welcomes both men and women to Fernandina!”
Ken explained adding: “In brief comments on Wednesday, Dec. 17, at the annual Menorah lighting at a pocket park on Centre, Chief Jeffrey Tambasco claimed our town was a welcoming place. ‘We welcome all religions, all genders, and all nationalities,’ the chief said without batting an eye.”
Giving credit to the local rabbi for stifling his laughter, Timmerman added: “Great credit must be given Rabbi Levi Katz of the local Chabad congregation, who managed to keep a straight face through the chief’s absurd statement.” Ken, a NY Times Best Selling author and war correspondent, who has penned several books, had an eye-opening suggestion for the befuddled Tambasco: “Perhaps the chief should visit a maternity ward.”
Ken’s comment in an online local busybody gossip column called Nextdoor caused a handful of area liberals (aka Democrats) to recoil in horror and respond in pearl-clutching shock as he suggested that the oblivious chief visit a maternity ward. This outraged the liberal locals who retorted with their standard biological hypothesis of “YEH! WELL, OH YEH!”
“Why should he do that?” a couple of choleric flat-earthers indignantly asked Ken, aghast that anyone would question their fantasy of an alphabet soup (LGBTQIAS,etc.) of sexes rather than the two (male and female) scientifically and irrefutably established shortly following conception and conclusively confirmed at birth.
The indisputable fact that there are but two sexes is as hard to grasp for these confused people as the fact that water is wet and Donald Trump is president.
Like Jiminy Cricket, these folks can wish upon all the stars they want, but unlike Mr. Cricket their delusions of guys becoming gals and vice versa will never happen anymore than their expectations that the rest of us should pretend along with them that it will.
Guys in bikinis wearing lipstick and sitting in bubble baths, sipping on Bud Light’s, pretending to be gals don’t need encouragement, they need psychiatric care as badly as Chief Tambasco needs a biology lesson. Also, If Bud Light’s marketing department had plopped Sydney Sweeny in that tub it couldn’t have brewed enough beer to meet the demand., but that’s a topic for another day.
Fernandina should hope Ken keeps his amusing observations local and doesn’t decide to skewer the chief and the city’s science deniers on a national stage.
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Hey Coach! Take Him Out: A number of weeks ago (September 26 https://www.davescottblog.com/fernandinas-top-cop-not-best-boss-award-candidate-media-local-cops-say-chief-a-disaster-morale-tanked/ ) I reported here that Fernandina’s Chief of Police Jeffrey Tambasco was extremely unpopular among the cops on the city’s police force and that his department was hemorrhaging experienced officers fed up with his indifference and lack of leadership.
News outlets in Jacksonville and Fernandina had previously reported on his lack of tact, lousy management style, spotty experience, and the grumbling among the rank and file. Nothing has changed.
In her tepid response to the media’s withering public criticism Fernandina Beach City Manager Sarah Campbell said she was coaching the chief and would continue to do so. She told Jacksonville’s FOLIO that she still has confidence in Tambasco and “will continue to coach the chief as I do with all of our department directors.”
OK, Coach Campbell how’s that tutoring going? Because what I continue to hear among the local police force is that the cops are just as discontent now as they were three months ago. Also, how does Ms. Campbell, who as far as I know, lacks any law enforcement experience, coach a police chief? That’s like asking a chess theorist to instruct the Chicago Bears’ linebackers.
Has the city considered conducting an employee survey to gauge the morale of these crucial employees?
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Speaking Of A City Brouhaha: Local resident Mac Morriss penned an eye-opening opinion editorial in the December 24 News Leader further opposing the paid parking scam being vigorously perpetuated by four members of the City Commission, one a shrewd schemer and three inept bobbleheads (my words, not Mac’s).
Morriss an online administrator of Facebook group “Amelia Island, Fernandina Beach, Nassau County Network” produced some interesting facts in opposition to the convoluted paid parking scheme, adding to the growing sentiment that it’s a scam providing the four Commissioners a piggy bank to spend on whatever they want without voter oversight.
They are:
- Of the two public petitions 8,615 signers were against paid parking and a minuscule 190 were for it.
- Morriss says the money for the infrastructure projects the commission quartet screams are vital is readily available through city budget cuts, state grants, fee and permit increases, and a share of the Tourist Development Council’s bed tax.
- Citizen organizations against paid parking indicate through their independent polls that 98 percent of the community is against parking meters.
Personally I have yet to meet a single resident or business owner who wants paid parking downtown.
Darron Ayscue is the lone City Commissioner not going along with the unpopular scam to have meters pick pockets and inconvenience shoppers. He has adamantly protested the efforts of the quarrelsome quartet to their deaf ears.
According to Morriss the only business beneficiaries of paid parking would be city restaurants, whose customers he says are eager to eat, then leave, thus opening a parking space for another hungry patron. Maybe it’s just coincidence that paid parking’s strongest advocate is Commissioner Tim Poynter, whose downtown businesses are all involved in selling food and drinks.
I have yet to talk to or hear from one Fernandina retail merchant who thinks paid parking is a good idea. As Morriss points out in his piece: “Fewer purchases are made when customers are rushing to beat the clock.”
Paid parking Morriss says would destroy Fernandina’s relaxed, charming, small town identity. Norman Rockwell would probably agree.
Business boosters, Chamber of Commerce and Fernandina’s Main Street, have both been conspicuously quiet on the paid parking issue, not taking any sides. Why? Aren’t they supposed to promote downtown businesses that pay annual dues to them?
In a year-end message Main Street touted an impressive variety of past programs but failed to mention the elephant on Main Street – paid parking. It could have listed potential solutions such as reducing or eliminating impact and building fees, and improving the city regulatory environment. Or how about monetizing (“privatizing”) dormant city-owned real estate assets? Or advocating for favorable tax treatment or discounts for property improvements?
The Chamber of Commerce is a totally impotent and inept organization, and I can’t figure out what benefit a business realizes from being a member. The organization is a total waste of member funds other than to pay a useless and unproductive staff to sit on their hands. Where’s the Chamber’s year-end list of accomplishments?
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Things I Wish I’d Said: “Since forty I have been regular about going to bed and getting up – and that is one of the main things. I have made it a rule to go to bed when there wasn’t anybody left to sit up with; and I have made it a rule to get up when I had to. This has resulted in an unswerving regularity of irregularity.” – Mark Twain